Eatpooplove’s Weblog

Don’t mess with The Beast

The Beast, like most men, is a creature of habit. If every single day of The Beast’s life was the same he would be happy. When anything happens that throws a wrench into his routine, he gets cranky. Unfortunately, this makes parenting a challenge for all parties.  Here is an example of how The Beast remains committed to his routine, despite the various and literal shitstorms that center around having a five month old. When Boozo puked in my face/mouth/pants/shirt, etc. the other day and then pooped in my hand while I was changing him, I needed my “teammate” to assist me. The Beast was busy washing bottles in the kitchen and while I’m sure he heard my cries for HELP NOW GODDAMMIT he was ignoring them. He is good at that. This forces me  to ask for help more loudly and to convince The Beast that it is a semi emergency. While puke in my mouth and poop in my hand is not, per se, an emergency of epic proportions, it seems an emergency when you are in the thick of it. When The Beast arrived at my side on stated morning and I said, Could you please help me for a minute he said (don’t hate him for this-he is a simple man from Canada who likes to stick with his plans): I AM TRYING TO WORK THROUGH MY MORNING ROUTINE. No lie. Is there a way to respond to that appropriately as your child’s vomit drips from your face and you are holding a large turd in your left hand?


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  1. * ctale says:

    I WILL hate him for it! D will often be in the room when Miss S falls or bumps her head or whatever and will continue to sit under the laptop typing away while staring at the screen saying “what bun bun? are you okay bun bun? type type type” until I come into the room to pick her up and hug her. And men wonder why kids always want their Mom’s first in all situations…

    hmph. boys.

    Posted 10 years, 2 months ago

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